Saturday, July 4, 2009


5:00 pm: Arrive at BBQ

5:01 pm: Slam a Limoncello shot

5:03 pm: Devour all the carrots on the vegetable platter

5: 30 pm: Am asked if I am bisexual

5:31 pm: Slam a Limoncello shot

5:32 pm: Avoiding bisexual advances

6:45 pm: Convince a small boy to bring me a Cinnamon Roll

6:50 pm: Discuss eating disorders while eating Cinnamon Roll

7:00 pm: Kris starts smoking a cigar

7:30 pm: Discuss what celebrities we most resemble

8:12 pm: Kris takes a break from cigar smoking

8:30 pm: Show everyone my tattoo

9:00 pm: Kris resumes cigar smoking

9:24 pm: Walk to park to watch Fireworks

9:47 pm: Kris throws remnants of cigar away

10:00 pm: Kris feels ill

10:01 pm: Kris is ill

10:20 pm: Discover our dog ran away

10:45 pm: Search for dog

11:30 pm: Search for dog aborted

11:55 pm: Collapse into bed

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