5 Worst Baby Items...

...in my short and humble experience.

When we were preparing for the arrival of the bean, there was an infinite amount of suggestions for must-haves that I collected from friends, families, blogs, and online reviews. So I put together a list of sorts and then proceeded to register and purchase some of these essential items. Now, over 8 weeks in, I have found that some of these items just don't work for me like:

1. The Wretched, Horrid, No Good Boppy! I can't tell you how many people swore by this thing, that if I had to take a single item to a desert island with me it would be this. Well, I'm here to say that I loathe and despise it. It doesn't fit well around my body AT ALL. More often then not Cohen manages to slip between the curve of the Boppy and my body so he's folded up in this weird valley about 6 inches lower than he should be. I'm constantly washing the slip covers which would be fine if I had several million dollars to keep a stack of clean fresh ones lying around. There have been days when I've had to use a burp cloth for a cover because all of the REAL covers are dirty. Lastly, and most importantly, it has become as squishy and misshapen as a marshmallow, all firmness and shape have all but vanished and no amount of time spent in the dryer with tennis balls is going to bring it back. I still use the darn thing but I don't enjoy it AT ALL.

2. Huggies Diapers and Wipes. We bought a HUGE tub of wipes, sensitive wipes, for when we brought Cohen home from the hospital and within 24 hours he had a bleeding rash on his bum and because we're new parents WITHOUT A CLUE it took us almost a week to figure out it was the wipes. We inadvertently discovered it on a day trip when we were using the ULTRA CHEAP-O no-name wipes we bought at the grocery store and VOILA! No more bleeding bum! The diapers leaked and left these weird silicone-type beads all over his man parts so we nixed the Huggies and we've been more than happy with Pampers. YAHOO!

3. BabyHawk Carrier. I so wanted this to be awesome but although it may LOOK really cool, it's not very functional for several very significant reasons. The straps are impossibly long, like drag on the bathroom floor long, and I'm not really excited about wrapping straps that have just slid across a public lavatory floor around my baby AND body. Their website says you can use it as early as newborn, which we proudly did during a trip to the mall, and I was idly window shopping when I noticed I was getting some weird looks and I look down to find Cohen, who was fast asleep, falling out the side. His body was more than HALF WAY out of the carrier, his head flopping like a cooked noodle. I thought it was because I wasn't tying it tight enough but no matter how I snugly I configured the straps after walking for about 15 minutes it would loosen up and start to sag so I would end up having to hoist him up and carry him anyway, which is not the most ideal feature of a baby carrier that advertises it's wonderful HANDS FREE design.

4. I never purchased a diaper bag. I thought I could just use what I had lying around. Except it turns out I have a suitcase and a handbag, nothing in the middle, so we've been using Kris' relic Jansport backpack which is as old as the hills and looks it. I don't really mind that it's the most unattractive tote on the face of the earth but the overall design of a backpack is so NOT conducive for using it as a diaper bag because everything ends up just getting piled on top of everything else, there isn't any form of organization, no compartments for bottles, no changing pad, just a mishmash of clothes, mixed with diapers, mixed with wipes, etc. I've been on the lookout for something decent and affordable and haven't found anything yet but I have high hopes.

5. Johnson and Johnson Bedtime Bath Soap & Lotion. I love the way this stuff smells, it wonderful and soothing and makes me want to gobble Cohen up, except that it irritates his skin beyond belief. He gets a bath every other night because we live in the DRIEST state ever and we don't want to rob his teeny baby body of all it's moisture. We started using the Bedtime Bath and Lotion right out of the gate and almost immediately Cohen developed this hive-lookin' rash all over his face and once we stopped using it everything has been fine, he still has dry skin (we're STILL working on getting that resolved) but at least it doesn't look like leprosy anymore.

My Two Cents

It never ceases to amaze me the controversy, judgement and hate that a single, isolated event can stir in people. By now, everyone is familiar with the Nadya Suleman and her octuplets. The media, true to form, has done their best to paint a less than flattering image of her, from plastic surgery, unemployment, fertility doctors, and their insistent reminder that she's on FOOD STAMPS. Oh, the horror!

It is apparent that Suleman has made some less than stellar decisions in life whether from naivete, foolishness, or mental instability, and it has been difficult NOT to judge her. It is far easier to assume that she has a few screws loose, she will be unable to afford to raise her 14 children, and that they can't possibly be getting all the attention and love they need. But not from lack of trying. I don't doubt that Suleman loves her children very much. So much, that if it were possible, she would continue to have children. Her joy seems to be entirely wrapped up in the having with little to no thought to the providing. This certainly isn't grounds for ripping her children away from her or sending death threats. She has more important things to be worrying about like coming up with 8 new baby names and dealing with those monster stretch marks she bared to the entire world.

What I find so hard to believe is the contempt people have for her, insisting that her children be taken from her so they can be in a more beneficial environment. The only argument they have against her is her financial incapability to feed, clothe and house these children ON HER OWN. In all other respects she is being the best mother she knows how to be and none of the children are complaining. Sure her house is dirty and messy but we're not talking about shit covering walls and roaches in the Rice Krispies. Not everyone can have a home with the potential to grace the cover of Architectural Digest and at least she's not neglecting her kids to run a vacuum or fold the endless piles of laundry that accumulate.

This is a significantly complicated scenario because anyone who is willing to help her is seen as forgiving her behavior and no one wants to risk their reputation by helping a woman whose children desperately need it. As a whole, people would rather see her be punished for her actions because that will teach her and anyone else contemplating having more than 1 child at a time a lesson. She just can't pop out 8 kids and expect the world to pay for them. Then EVERYONE would start getting multiple eggs implanted and we'd be overrun with the likes of Nadya Suleman and their litters of children and we would ALL be footing the bill. There goes life as we know it. The End.

Since when did asking for help get answered with a death threat?